Every year many of us engage in a ritual that leads to failure and disappointment: creating and breaking New Year’s resolutions. In December we decide, say, that we want to lose weight, declutter our homes, make better choices in relationships, or practice meditation or yoga regularly. And several weeks after January 1st, we realize that we have failed and…
End-of-the-year magazines, web sites and television shows always amuse me with their features about New Year resolutions. Full of strategies for how-to, when-to and ought-to, the crescendo gets as loud as Times Square on December 31st. Then there’s a short silence, followed by all of the same voices reminding you that over 88% of all New Year resolutions fail by…
Stripped by debilitating depression of the capacity to love meant healing inside before truly bonding with another
In seventh grade, I decided to try out for my school musical. With no prior singing experience or vocal talent whatsoever, I clearly didn’t think it through. As I naively stood in line waiting for my audition, the girls around me asked one another, “What are you going to sing?” They each named a different song from a Broadway play,…
I am sitting in the Good Stuff Diner on West 14th Street across from Nicky Vreeland, a maroon-robed Buddhist monk with deep smile lines. A gifted photographer with an exquisite W Magazine-sponsored exhibit at ABC Carpet & Home to benefit the Tibet Center, Vreeland has mentioned that he finds harmony in his pictures. “Did that train you for life as a monk?” I ask. “I think that…
When Julia Child said “Never apologize,” she was addressing the tendency of cooks—often female cooks—to insist on the insufficiency of their creations. This isn’t the way I meant it to turn out. I hoped it would be spicier. I’m sorry about the frosting. It’s not as pretty as I thought it would be. She thought these apologies had no place in learning—or…
Funny movie about madness and depression
I was leading a workshop at a recent conference when a woman bravely said what so many in the room were thinking: “I feel like I’ve lost myself. I’ve lost my best self. I don’t know where I went.” Other women nodded in agreement. It is no wonder. We pack our days with “to dos,” responsibilities, and “shoulds.” We take…
Every moviegoer knows that Darth Vader was seduced by the dark side of the Force. Tapping its volcanic energies of anger, hatred, and fear, he gained awesome powers, but at the cost of his humanity. And then, of course, there’s the story of Faust, who sold his immortal soul to the Devil so he could gain the world. Beware of…
