Forget happy people. How about we go for ecstatic? Maybe a little mind-blowing even? When it comes to your sex, workouts, food or relationships, why do we stop at happy? Who told you that content was enough, and more was greedy?

I’m currently sorting this out for myself, beginning to understand the way I grew up created a fear around wanting more than just happy. Nowadays, I find myself really excited about the miracles around me and super enthusiastic about my role in the Universe, and how I might help others break out of their rule boxes and get to living more fiercely alive.

I’m beginning to see whoever told us to shoot for the moon was right – although I’m aiming for another galaxy at this point, forget the moon. I want to feel so alive my toes curl, and the smile brought on by the mix of the waves crashing on the beach – blanketed by a trillion, sparkling stars – is so big I have trouble getting rid of it for days.

Here’s the thing about what I’m proposing: you have to be willing to feel it all, including the opposite of ecstatic. Because you can’t feel one end of the spectrum without knowing the feeling of the other, opposite, sickeningly intense end. The beauty of this is that the more you nudge yourself out to the ledge of those emotions, the more of the abyss you can spy from that vantage point, and the better that jump is going to feel on the way down.

If you can sit with the feelings the worst things bring, you can also reach up to the sky and feel the most mind-blowing ecstasy. I believe one allows us the other.

I had to be willing to touch deep sadness and despair, rage and a bit of desperation in my life and relationships for the bliss to show up. And believe me, it did. You don’t have to worry about doing the difficult work of healing and not being rewarded. How do I know this? Because the person who’s practiced this kind of awareness is privy to the magic – it’s an automatic benefit.

If you’re ready for more than happy, and you’ve been stuck with voices telling you not to be selfish, greedy, irresponsible or entitled, it’s time to understand something: it’s okay to want more. Why should we want more? Because when you’re filled with the knowing that you were born to feel and have it all, and that having and feeling it all means you can shine a brighter light on those around you, well that’s called purpose.

Wanting more than just happy doesn’t mean you are selfish or greedy. It means you see life as a miracle, and the opportunity to live it like the magic carpet ride it is. It means you already practice being ridiculously grateful for what you have. It means you were born to feel and heal the world.

That deep desire, the desperate ache that pulls you uncomfortably out of bed and pushes you to search for the fire starters, the passion-fuel, the inspirational connections and heart-felt collaborations; that feeling is how you know you were meant for more than happy. You were meant to be delirious and drunk off this life of yours. You were meant to not want to waste one drop.

Don’t waste one more drop. Do, live, be and breathe the things you love. Pass on the other stuff more often. And when you’re suffering, know the deeper you go, the wider your lens will be when you get to the other side. Be afraid, but dive anyway; the rewards will outweigh the pain – you just have to jump. Wake up and jump.